Slowly but surely
A couple years ago, heck, even two months ago, I would have been beating myself up pretty bad about my current state. You see, the past few months I’ve been very busy in the community: Motivational talks, lectures, cooking classes, on and on. So, busy that truthfully I haven’t been as dedicated to my fitness and weight loss goals. I can’t recall the last time I worked out at the gym and I haven’t recorded a decrease on the scale in umpteen months.
I’m 40 years old and have been overweight my entire life. I’ve never been what you called a “normal” size. I’m not sure what the statistics on beating childhood obesity are, but I’m sure they’re slim (no pun intended). Despite what the statistics may be, to date with a conscious change to my diet, mindful eating, and exercise I’ve lost 170 pounds. I am proud of myself for what I have accomplished. But I also can be pretty hard on myself for what I haven’t accomplished.
The more mature, intuitive Chrisetta, recognizes that it’s pretty unrealistic of me to think that I can make obesity go away overnight or even in a span of a few years. The Chrisetta of the past would have beat herself up for being in this current state of flux. Called herself names. But no longer. I’m a place in my life, a place in this journey where I’m not going to let those negative thoughts consume me. That’s a part of the battle — learning to not think and speak negative thoughts, learning to be kinder, more flexible and forgiving of myself. Does that mean that I am giving up on my goals? Quite the opposite. It just means that instead of pushing myself so hard, focusing so much on the destination. I’m going to ease up — live a healthy, fulfilled life, and enjoy the journey.
Today, I’m healthier, happier, more peaceful and content. Oh, and 170 pounds lighter. Slowly but surely, I’m saying farewell to my old childhood nemesis, obesity.
Chrisetta Mosley
I am a product – and now a survivor – of childhood obesity. As a child, my family always told me that my extra weight was merely baby fat and I’d eventually grow out of it. I never did. Instead, my childhood is filled with memories of not being able to ride a bike, flattening its training wheels from being over the recommended weight, and avoiding P.E. classes by any means necessary. For years, I wore my fatness like a wounded soldier wears a Purple Heart - with pride. I owned the look. I dressed it up. I worked the room. There wasn't a skinny girl who intimidated me. I made sure my hair was laid just right. Nails polished. Outfits coordinated to the tee. Accessories to compliment every outfit. But everyone has a breaking point, and mine came in the spring of 2004 when I tipped the scale at nearly 400 pounds 388 to be exact. I was MISERABLE trapped inside of that body. I no longer wore my Purple Heart with pride. Rather, I was ashamed and frightened. Ashamed that I had allowed food to become my everything – frightened I would die because of it. Drastic times called for drastic measures... Today, I’m bound and determined to live a better, healthier, active lifestyle. I realize I’m no longer a passenger in my life, I’m the driver. I’m overcoming my inhibitions and I’m slowly but surely saying farewell to my old childhood nemesis, obesity. For once and for all, Farewell Fatso!